Last night I was literally laying in my bed watching the minutes tick by on my roommates clock. I got to thinking. I have no idea what I am doing with my life. Here I am supposedly half way done with college and I cant picture where I want to be in 20 years let a lone 5. I am not satisfied with my major, I feel like I am wasting my time and money on an education that I am not getting anything out of, and I just do not know what I am doing with my life.
I then got to thinking about what I have done with the last 19 years of my life. I have had some wonderful opportunities but there are things I would change if I could go back. You know all those cliche songs and poems and quote about if you could write a letter to yourself or travel back in time and tell yourself what to do. I think I would take the chance to do just that. I would tell myself to not get fat, to go out and make friends instead of curling up with a book and food. I would tell myself to study harder, get better grades, and get involved early. I would make sure my dad was screened for cancer earlier. I would tell myself to practice the piano more and get better. I would tell myself to stay close to the Lord. I would tell myself to always pray morning and night, and to always read my scriptures. I would warn myself of the mistakes I have made and implore myself to not make them.
OK, so where would that leave me? I don't know but I can't help but think that I would be a better person (I honestly love who I am but these would be awesome improvements).
But I can't change the past. I can't do anything to remedy the trials I have been through. So now I focus on the future, but the problem with that is I don't know, I cannot see nor predict my future. I don't even know what I want to do.
I am so used to living my life one day at a time. It was easier that way. I started doing that when my dad got sick. Just take it a day at a time. Hold yourself together for 15-20 hours then start anew the next morning. That is how I survived. Now it has been over 3 years and I am still doing that. I am surviving, not thriving. But I am stuck. I cannot seem to find the path that was made for me. I feel like I am just floundering around.
So I have concluded that I am just a work in progress. I don't know what I am doing with my life. I am trying to lose weight, I am striving to become a better member Mormon, and I am trying to find my way.
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Thursday, April 3, 2014
My 2 cents on women and the priesthood
I am a single Mormon woman who a week ago Saturday had the amazing opportunity to attend a broadcast of the General Women's Meeting. This was the first time since long before I was born where all women of the church over the age of 8 were gathered together to listen to the inspired words of our church leaders. I was near tears from the very beginning because I have never felt the presence of the Holy Ghost so strongly during a broadcast. All I could think the whole time is that I hope that the precious young daughters of God who I will be given stewardship over this summer at Oakcrest were also in attendance somewhere. We truly heard divine inspiration.
Fast forward to today. This Saturday is the start of the 184th Semi-Annual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Recently there has been a lot of attention thrown on the Church, specifically the women of the Church. Not all this attention has been good. The New York Times recently published an article entitled "From Mormon Women, a Flood of Requests and Questions on Their Role in the Church"which you can read here or even this article, also published in The New York Times, about how the lowering of the mission age for girls is signaling a "growing role for Mormon women".
Let me explain to you why I, Maegan Kasteler, will not be attending the Ordain Women movement.
I, Maegan Kasteler, am a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father who has much love for me and all of his children. I know this. I know that I have divine nature that is not altered or swayed by the views and opinions of the world. I believe that women have been endowed with certain attributes that allow us to be mothers, to nurture, to bear and rear children.
Now that I have explained some of my beliefs let me better explain exactly why I am not attending the Ordain Women movement.
We live in a world that I believe is trying to make everything equal. Equal is good there should not be things like segregation and discrimination. However, "equal" does not always mean "same". 2+2 equals 4 just as much as 3+1 equals 4.
I am a strong independent woman who wishes to have a career and to be successful. I also desire to be a mother and to raise children in the gospel. I do not have the desire to hold the priesthood. I have lived in a family that for the past 2+ years has not had a holder of the Melchizedek priesthood in the home. I have felt that hole and it has been all too real. But I still have the priesthood in my life. I have grandfathers, uncles, friends, and church leaders who are ready and willing and worthy to exercise their God given power on behalf of me. Throughout this time I have been able to be reassured in my calling as a Woman in the Gospel. I have power that I am unaware of. I have the ability to do more than my mortal mind can comprehend. I do not need to hold the priesthood to reap the benefits.
I can see where the members of the OW movement are coming from. If you look at it, it does appear that the Church oppresses women. Here is how I see it, by encouraging us to rear and bear children the Church encourages us to exercise a God given power to gestate and give birth to His children. We are asked and have the ability to be the sacred vessels to bring these choice spirits into the world. Notice I said a "God given power". I used that phrase earlier to describe the priesthood.
And that is how I see it. It is simple. We have been endowed with sacred power, both men and women, the power is different but we are equal. God sees us all as his children, we should all see in ourselves and others what God sees us and who he knows we can become.
*I hope that I have not offended anyone. This is my personal blog where I am free to express my opinions. Please if you have any negative comments refrain from posting them on my blog! Thank you!
Fast forward to today. This Saturday is the start of the 184th Semi-Annual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Recently there has been a lot of attention thrown on the Church, specifically the women of the Church. Not all this attention has been good. The New York Times recently published an article entitled "From Mormon Women, a Flood of Requests and Questions on Their Role in the Church"which you can read here or even this article, also published in The New York Times, about how the lowering of the mission age for girls is signaling a "growing role for Mormon women".
Let me explain to you why I, Maegan Kasteler, will not be attending the Ordain Women movement.
I, Maegan Kasteler, am a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father who has much love for me and all of his children. I know this. I know that I have divine nature that is not altered or swayed by the views and opinions of the world. I believe that women have been endowed with certain attributes that allow us to be mothers, to nurture, to bear and rear children.
Now that I have explained some of my beliefs let me better explain exactly why I am not attending the Ordain Women movement.
We live in a world that I believe is trying to make everything equal. Equal is good there should not be things like segregation and discrimination. However, "equal" does not always mean "same". 2+2 equals 4 just as much as 3+1 equals 4.
I am a strong independent woman who wishes to have a career and to be successful. I also desire to be a mother and to raise children in the gospel. I do not have the desire to hold the priesthood. I have lived in a family that for the past 2+ years has not had a holder of the Melchizedek priesthood in the home. I have felt that hole and it has been all too real. But I still have the priesthood in my life. I have grandfathers, uncles, friends, and church leaders who are ready and willing and worthy to exercise their God given power on behalf of me. Throughout this time I have been able to be reassured in my calling as a Woman in the Gospel. I have power that I am unaware of. I have the ability to do more than my mortal mind can comprehend. I do not need to hold the priesthood to reap the benefits.
I can see where the members of the OW movement are coming from. If you look at it, it does appear that the Church oppresses women. Here is how I see it, by encouraging us to rear and bear children the Church encourages us to exercise a God given power to gestate and give birth to His children. We are asked and have the ability to be the sacred vessels to bring these choice spirits into the world. Notice I said a "God given power". I used that phrase earlier to describe the priesthood.
And that is how I see it. It is simple. We have been endowed with sacred power, both men and women, the power is different but we are equal. God sees us all as his children, we should all see in ourselves and others what God sees us and who he knows we can become.
*I hope that I have not offended anyone. This is my personal blog where I am free to express my opinions. Please if you have any negative comments refrain from posting them on my blog! Thank you!
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