Blessed Beyond Words

Today while walking around campus I was hit with an overwhelming sense of gratitude. I am so very blessed. Coming up to Utah State University was really hard on me. I've had my fair share of trials over the past few years and moving out was one of them. However today I realized that I have been very blessed as well. I have met some amazing people and have learned so much from them. I am also surrounded by incredible beauty. It has been snowing for a couple days up here and despite the sub-zero temps everything is beautiful.

YEAH-E-YEAH-E-YEAH-E-YEAH its a party at UTAH STATE

Karaoke Night.
nuff said.

But really. Tonight was a much needed break from life

no stress

no drama

no dishes to clean up after I ate

And as pathetic as this is while dancing on chairs at Pizza Pie Cafe this evening it hit me how lucky I am to have met such amazing people up here at USU who are as crazy if not more so than I am. 

I mean these are people I met just a few months ago who let me call them babe and doll face. 

The greatest people in the world go to Utah State.

don't get me started on the snow.

Something I have been dreading

I have neglected my blog.
I was thinking about this fact today and I discovered what I think is the reason.

I have nothing to say.

So here's a video of a moment that I dread but that hopefully will turn out as wonderful as this...

I've said Hello and Goodbye

It has finally (almost) come to an end. The first semester of my college experience.
This semester has been quite eventful. I have met so many wonderful people and made many lasting friendships.  At the same time I have said goodbye to some amazing people.  One of my best friends passed away.  I am also getting ready to say goodbye to many people I have met up here.  I feel like I just met them and it is already time to say goodbye.  I am so grateful for the lasting friendships I have gained over the past few short months. Also this semester I have had one job, quit that job, gotten a different job, been accepted to be on A-Team next year, had a calling, and I have also learned a lot about myself.  I am so excited to continue going to school up here.  Utah State University has literally been the best decision I have ever made.

The boys gave each other haircuts

My dear friend Elder Johnson

Went and saw I Believe in Christmas with some amazing friends

Christian, one of my first friends up here was an elf in the play

Missed this kid a lot and was so happy when I saw him again

we have lots of fun... and Christian stole my phone

My roommates enjoying the pleasures of an evening to relax

Another dear friend Elder Lant, Had to say goodbye to him

met one of my hero's Michael McLean

Went bowling and surprised myself with my score

Some amazing people, the last time all of them will be together

Date night gingerbread house decorating contest

late night McDonalds run

another boy I have missed a lot since moving

life is good

How terrible it is to love something death can touch

Today I lost a dear friend.
Tiffany was and is one of the most amazing people I have had the privilege of knowing.  She had the brightest smile and was so caring.  I loved going to lacrosse games with her and seeing her when she would come visit my sewing class.  She was such a sweetheart.  I love her to pieces and know I would not be where I am today if it weren't for her. She helped pull me through the passing of my father and she taught me how to be happy through the hardest times.  Word cannot describe the pain I have felt hearing of her passing.  Tiffany touched my heart, and I have been forever changed.

I love you Tiff!

How terrible it is to love something death can touch.

"Trashbagging" Old Main

This is my first ever video blog... Had so much fun playing around! I just love spur of the moment random dangerous things!

I am Never Alone, It's been a Year

Yesterday it was less then a year.  Tomorrow it will be more than a year.

But today it has been ONE year.

Every time I have looked at the time today all I can do is remember exactly where I was this day last year.  I have relived every moment of 11/18/2011 in my mind today.  

I realize some of you who may be reading this might not know the significance of this date in my life. A year ago today my best friend, my comforter, my protector, my daddy passed away. 

Words cannot describe the despair I have felt, the moments of weakness I have suffered, the nights I have cried myself to sleep.  Through it all the one thing that has kept me going is the knowledge that my family is forever.  That my daddy is here with me still my best friend, still my comforter, still my protector, still my daddy.  

Despite this knowledge this year has been a tough one.  I think about all the moments in my life that I wish my daddy could be there for; my wedding, when I have kids, graduate from college, get my first house... Then I think of how many things have happened in my life in just the last year that I wish he could have been there for; moving to college, turning 18, speaking at high school graduation... Then when I am thinking about speaking at graduation I think of how I did that for him.  How he told me one of his biggest dreams was to see one of his kids speak at graduation.  Which leads me to think about all the amazing blessings that have come from this trial.  I have learned so much about myself.  I have developed an unshakable testimony of eternal families, the power of the priesthood and faith.  I have learned how to relate to people who have gone through this like I have.  I have discovered what I want to be when I grow up.  

To this day, when I spend nights at home I still think my dad just hasn't come home from work yet.  That he will pull up in the driveway.   Sometimes all I want is my daddy to hold me in his arms and hug me.  Honestly, words cant and never will describe how I feel about the loss of my dad-and there's only one person who will understand.  

My dad sent me this song in an e-mail once, I now find it one of the most comforting things he left for me.  

I miss my dad more than words can describe.  But I really do know that I am Never Alone, he is always nearby.